


Troll John Travolta?

by ArchivalFootage



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Crack, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, M/M, i can't remember if it's crack or not, i wrote this 3 years ago, johnkat - Freeform, lol sue me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-28
Updated: 2015-06-28
Packaged: 2018-04-06 14:30:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4225410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArchivalFootage/pseuds/ArchivalFootage
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John's mad at Karkat, who's probably more in love with troll John Travolta at the moment than John. </p><p> </p><p>welp, I'm slowly uploading my three-year old fics, and I'm pretty sure this is crack. Not exactly sure what was going through my mind back then... I vaguely remember this as being angst originally, but it's far from that now. I might re-write it, but for know, have some dumb shit I wrote at 2 AM three years ago :^)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Troll John Travolta?

 

John sunk into the couch, sliding lazily till his body was on the floor. Karkat stole a couple of glances to his boyfriend, but generally ignored him in favour of the movie playing. John’s face dropped forwards to his knees, his arms sprawled beside him. Karkat’s jaw clenched and his lip turned up into a snarl, but he breathed in, breathed out, and said rather calmly, “If you’re going to mope around, at least mope in your room. I actually like this movie, and you’re ruining it. Go away.”

John sighed, his voice completely frustrated: “I’m not going anywhere; I pay for half of this apartment, and therefore get to go where I want. Plus, this movie sucks. I mean seriously, Kar, it sucks.”

“Oh, my god, just because you’re a pessimistic little ball of shit today, doesn’t mean anyone cares. Get up and get out, or get up and appreciate the masterpiece in front of your eyes,” Karkat said, curling his hands into fists, digging in his grubby fingernails, and releasing them. “This is a ten second grace period. Ten, nine, eight…” John crawled back up onto the sofa, adjusting to his previous position on the floor, except that he was lying against Karkat instead of the sofa.  
”Get off.” John turned over. He stared into the side of Karkat’s head, who refused to look his way. Why was he so invested in this dumb movie? I mean, really, what’s so good about fucking Troll-Grease?

Feeling slightly jealous of a movie from the 70’s, as well as more than slightly embarrassed that he was jealous of a romcom, John finally got off the couch. He spared a glance over at the TV screen, noticing Troll John Travolta singing some stupid song, with his stupid hair, I mean, fuck you Troll John Travolta!

Why was he so mad about a simple film? A simple, terrible, boooring film. It was a musical, which automatically lowered its entertainment value by 50%, according to John. And as with any of Karkat’s films, it was a romance. Blech.

But no, if John was honest with himself, the movie wasn’t the true reason he was mad. It seemed like Karkat was just really emotionally distant the past two weeks, and after the immediate “OH GOD what did I do?!” faze, John had moved directly to the faze where every sentence that came out of his mouth went something like, “Oh, well, I don’t care. That’s just dandy. Totally not passive aggressive here. Nope.”

Was it because he wasn’t as cool as, say, Troll John Travolta? No, that couldn’t possibly be it. Although, John had to admit, Troll John Travolta was a fine piece of ass… But that was beside the point.

Did John forget about something important? No, that couldn’t have been it either. John was proud to say that after a year of not updating his calendar a single time, he finally started filling out his Nicholas Cage themed calendar that Dave had made him for Christmas. All his important dates were on there. Oh, Dave, you always know how to cheer a Nick Cage fanatic right up.

And yet… there was always a possibility. John was somewhat forgetful, and the lingering tension that had come between Karkat and him for the past two weeks was becoming unbearable. John stood up straight, momentarily thought about greasing his hair and wearing a leather jacket to get Kar’s attention, immediately dropped the idea, lamented his genius plot, and said in possibly the worse way possible, “Karkat, what the fuck’s your deal?”

Karkat turned around to face John as slowly as possible, muttering “What’d you just say to me?” It was made 10x scarier by the fact that he didn’t swear once.

“U-uhm, I mean—”

“What’s my deal? What’s your deal? You forgot our anniversary!”

John stood dumbstruck. After a second of registering the accusation, he shouted indignantly “N-no I didn’t!” Nice. Smooth. Cool. Troll John Travolta would be proud.

Karkat rolled his eyes. “Yes, you did. It was two weeks ago. Don’t you remember?”

John searched his brain for an explanation. Their anniversary was most definitely not two weeks ago! John was 100% sure it was the following week. So why would Karkat, master of all things romance, think it was two weeks prior? It suddenly hit him.

“You—you _dork_. Yeah, our anniversary for our first date was two weeks ago. Our first official, ‘this is a Real relationship©, yay!’ was three weeks later! And the anniversary of the first time we spoke is in three months. Just so you know.”

Karkat stared in silence at John. Then his cheeks slowly began to burn in embarrassment. “Oh,” was all he mumbled, turning his face away from John.

“‘Oh’ is right, you colossal nerd,” John teased, walking over to the couch. “Look, sorry for not celebrating our first date, or whatever.” Karkat mumbled something along the lines of ‘it’s ok’ without looking at John.

“I’ll make it up to you,” John promised. “Do you know how?”

“How?” Karkat asked, turning his head to face John.

“Our anniversary of our first hot sexy times is in four weeks and oOF—”

“wh— John! That’s not romantic at all! No one even calls it that! Get out of my house, you unromantic sack of crap!”

Welp, John thought, while being pelted by pillows. It’s better than being ignored, maybe? Maybe…

**Author's Note:**

> haa im sorry that this exists


End file.
